Who Is Jaren

A third-person view of Jaren through the eyes of a friend…

Jaren Charles Cudilla…Born on the 18th day of the first Month of the Year 1980, to a strict, but good family full of love and happiness and thus raised Jaren to be respectful, Responsible, strong and caring. Jaren the second child of three siblings.

Always felt that he was adopted, because we all know that the eldest son gets all the attention and the youngest always get spoiled being the middle child, Jaren never had the pleasure of the either. He hated the fact at how his father disciplines him (Jaren) , how his dad was very strict with him, in contrast to his brother and sister. How he was trained to be responsible and follow anything and everything his parents say (or commanded) without question.

Even through the hardships and all the heartaches he felt, He still came out strong. Jaren told me once during his usual ramblings is that the reason why his dad was so strict with is that Jaren has the potential to be great and has a very strong (sometimes rebellious) character. And with all the pain and hardships that he experienced he came out strong, and is now thankful that his parents treated him that way.

Jaren may seem aloof, and appear cold and uncaring, and even frightening the first time you meet him. ( believe me, I was frightened too, the first time we met) but deep inside he treasures and helps and does anything for the one who calls him a friend. He is a true friend that won’t leave you whatever happens, but be wary if you abuse his trust, he can forget you in an instant. It’s hard to earn his trust and his respect, but if are able to earn his trust and respect he’s your friend for life. Even simple things that he can do to help. He’s there always behind you’re back supporting you. Jaren is the type of guy that wouldn’t lie to you even if the truth hurts. He said that it’s better to know the whole truth and take the pain, than to be lied upon little by little, and suffer for a long time.

Jaren is a guy with multiple personalities and you have to know him all your life to be able to understand him. He’s a very simple yet complicated guy. You can’t understand him sometimes, if you try to comprehend him you’ll only get freaked out. He’s defensive and always patiently explains every topic in complete detail. He is really one of a kind, and it would take years to really know him…He’s always the grumpy as if he’s having a period, but there are times that he’s so happy, that he won’t stop bugging you until you nod in approval or something. Sensible but at times could be difficult.. he’s a smart man who learned his lessons in life (the hard way) the way he wanted it to be.. he could be nice., he could be mean.. but with me, he doesn’t have much choice but to be a gentleman, well that’s what his dad, (his hero) trained him to be. Jaren has substance, might not be obvious at first glance, but he’s really sane, sensible, a little bit eccentric but interesting to talk to. He’s the guy that has all the steps of his day planned out complete with plan b to plan z.

Jaren is the type of guy that has his own mindset, and can be a loner at times, He doesn’t care what other people thinks, but can be paranoid at times, I remember him telling me that everywhere he goes he always stands out in the crowd, every one was looking at him even though his trying his best to remain unnoticed. Now is it the way he looks, the way he dresses, his hairstyle, or what? Well to tell you the truth, Jaren is tall for an average Filipino guy. He towers above us at 5’11”, so is he cute? Yes he is, but you have to look at him a bit longer and know him personally before you notice that. He’s not a headturner, after all he’s a One-Looker but he has a strong appeal that made me weak, and his choice of haircuts is either skinhead type or what they call ‘semi-kal’, or his trademark “LION” type hair, (the “LION” type hair, as he calls it, a very weird spiked haircut that you can’t get on a barbershop) he shaves his hair all by himself, and he never shaves his goatee, that makes him look more menacing. And dresses the way he wants, baggy pants, weird shirt designs. But I love him for it, He looks like a “puppy dog” than a “LION”. HAHAHA! (sorry Jaren!)

What interest me the most about him is that we can talk about anything, and you wouldn’t get bored with him. He’s also the reason why my boyfriend and I broke up (it’s because my boyfriend got jealous of him).

Thoughts from Jaren that made me think of my life…

“Don’t listen to what other people say about you… it’s there right because that’s what you show them… but don’t conform to what other people are saying… it would only make you dumb.. for believing what they say about you. You, yourself should not. but if you don’t know yourself then you’re just as stupid as them…”

Jaren is a born romantic… Accidentally found this scribbled on his notebook

“give me a reason not to love you and i promise i wont stop loving you”

upon seeing me “accidentally” read his scribbled note

Jaren said, “the corniness strikes again!!!”
I said, “I think it’s cute”, “corny is cute”
Jaren said, “i’m not cute… and i don’t find being corny as cute…i’m sick of myself for being mushy…”
I said, “It’s not normal for you to be that way, it really stinks, I know , but love makes you do corny stuff”
Jaren said in defensive mode, “that’s why girls can’t get over me…hehehe”

…Then shrugs it off as if never happen.

Jaren is a sarcastic, ironic dude that makes him unpredictable, moody, cool, calm, mysterious exuding weirdness to the point of paranoia. Jaren is obsessed to the point that he would research on a topic,even if it means forgetting personal health just to satisfy his intellectual questions and ramblings.

Jaren as an eccentric hermit

“don’t be ashamed of your age… it’s a sign of wisdom( if we know how to use it) and experiences(good or bad) to be shared to someone or everyone who needs it”
“don’t play safe and don’t be afraid to try new things”
it depends on how they judge you… and who the f*ck are they to judge…

Jaren as a Visionary

“I can’t change the world, I can’t turn back time better accept the fact that it happened and there’s nothing you can do about it but rise up and start anew”

Jaren as the love doctor

“well, that’s the fun in life… you get hurt, you earn experience, you get up on your feet again… no use crying if your life’s all f*cked up…words can’t hurt you, if you know you’re not…”

Jaren as the Psychiatrist and an experienced war veteran

“I heard too many sh!ts, I’ve encountered a lot of problems, But I still find time to laugh… and not get pissed off and b*tch at everyone… everytime something bad happens… I’m used to being disappointed, I’m used to being rejected… all my life I always encountered bad things… but I turn them into a fuel to help me improve myself and be stronger… we all made mistakes, but that should not stop us from growing as an elite individual, and a stronger person”

Jaren as the loner

“ever since I was a kid… I’m used to being alone…I’m used to being ridiculed, i’m always left alone, I don’t have many friends, so i always relied on myself…”

Jaren giving me a warning

“My outlook in life (”f*ck the world I don’t need you”)”

“I didn’t choose my friends they were the ones that chose to go with me”
My Tip for you If you can’t handle my attitude think twice…
I won’t change for anyone…If you don’t want my company… you think I’m weird well, f*ck you… I can live my own life…”

Radical to the point of the extremes…

from the post Who Is Jaren