Baby, I’m afraid I need you.

Posted by Jaren
Posted on June 14, 2008
Filed Under thoughts |

I am sorry, I never wanted you to go, I love you and I don’t want to lose you. Please give me another chance. I know that it will be different this time.

At first, I thought It was okay, but when I realized that what I really want is your love, I got so hurt, and it’s very hard to pass the time, because it keeps coming in my thoughts of how I was very wrong, I’m afraid, I’m alone.

I thought about killing myself a couple of times, I already went to the roof deck of my condo building, and almost jumped. But I want to see this through. If I killed myself, I just did the easy way. But I won’t kill myself. I’ll keep hoping and loving you.

I admit that I’m immature and I’m afraid, but I can change and I Want to change for you, for our relationship. I’m ready for the next level in our relationship. I want to be with you forever.

Some days ago, I faced my fear, and told our relationship to my family, I know that at first they couldn’t understand, but I talked to them honestly and told them how much I really love you. After talking for quite sometime, my parents understood and became supportive.

Right now, I’m trying to fix myself, and I’m looking for a job and trying to take back my life, I know that everyone has a chance for a new start and that everyone can change. This next few days, I have some perspective job interviews lined up, and this time, I’ll go to the interviews, and not be the arrogant fool that I am.

I can’t stop pacing around my condo unit. I’m walking and walking and thinking… I wish and I hope that everything will be okay and everything will be back to what it was. I can’t stop thinking, hoping and praying that this will be okay.

I’ve been praying that I would do the right thing and I’ve been asking myself this question for a long time.

“Do I really love you? the answer is YES, I DO, Baby, I REALLY LOVE YOU.”

And that answer came to me and it’s all clear now. I love you, I really do. I don’t want to lose you, If you would give me another chance, we can start a new chapter in our life, in our relationship.

Everyone can change,
Everyone needs and deserves another chance.
I’m A fool, I was wrong, I’m sorry.
I’m praying that all would be alright.

“Lord, I hope and pray that everything will be alright”

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